Taking a break...

I'm burnt out.. Taking a small hiatus...

Rumer Willis is ugly.

Demi Moore and Bruce Willis are living proof that two gorgeous people, do not necessarily make a beautiful child. I know it's harsh, but damn this girl is ugly.
Fuck. I mean you'd think that maybe she would get a hairstyle that played down the size of that big ass face. Ugh. At least she got rid of the blonde. Wait. Maybe she looked less ugly like that.

Is Lindsay Lohan engaged?

No. I refuse to believe the silly rumors going around about Lindsay. If I were famous, I would totally date someone for like a week and then start wearing a fat rock, just to stir shit up.
Linds is probably doing the same thing. Get out of my head Lindsay.

La Lohan is shopping where?

Dood. Something must have gotten lodged into Lindsay's fat-head, because the bitch is shopping at Forever 21. Uh, excuse me?
Yes. After making her rounds yesterday throughout Los Angeles, La Lohan ended up at The Grove - not bad - but then proceeded into Forever 21. Alright. You know, a girl like me shops at that place, not Lindsay. I don't even think Britney Spears would shop at that place.
Uh. Stupid Utah has changed our girl forever. And oh yeah, the boob shot? That's awesome.

Britney's Blackout not doing as well as expected...

The anticipation of Britney's new album is less than it should be. I guess - I don't guess, I read this - that the pre-sale of her album is not doing well.
I don't know why. Her music isn't highly original, but it's fun. Always. Brit, or I should say her producers, always deliver.
I'll be buying it. October 30th peeps.

Heidi and Spencer lack so much, but I love them.

I wouldn't even know where to begin with this one. I'm all out of energy for the day, but I could not let this go by...
Spencer and Heidi decided to film her music video Thursday in Los Angeles. You like how Spencer is filming the thing. It feels somewhat amateur-pornish, no? Yes.
What will they do next? Fuck! They were doing publicity at Taco Bell earlier this week. And then this. This is why I love them.

Deshawn Stevenson has an unhealthy obsession for Lindsay...

Jeebus. It's sooo good to see someone else that has an obsession for Lindsay Lohan. It makes me feel sane again, ya know? Or wait, it might make me feel creepier...
Deshawn Stevenson who plays basketball for the Washington Wizards is apparently offering up about 10K, just for her digits. Wait, what?!
Here's what he posted on his myspace page:

I Got A Couple Ppl On The Lindsay LoHan Deal………………. But Im Giving Somebody 10 Stacks If They Hook That Sh*t Up…………….. 4 U Slow Ppl 10 Thousand Dollars 2 The First Muthaf*cker Get Me The Contact 4 Her!!!!!!! Before My Ppl Get The Number They Moving 2 Slow 4 Me So Holla At Yo Boy If U Need That 10,000 Grand!!!!!!!!! U Kno I Need That White Girl Lindsay Lohan…………. First N*gga Or Female Get Me That Sh*t I Wire That Money Str8 2 Ur Account Hit Me On Email If U Got The Real Sh*t!!!!!!! TwoFamily@mac.com………………… Yadddddaaaaa Boy

Hell yea boy. I don't know how I would feel if someone was trying to track my shit down like that, they'd probably pay about 50 cents.

Spears, Spears, Spears.

Fuckin-A Britney. Come on. She seriously can't do anything right.
Britney has now lost all visitation rights with Jayden James and Sean Preston. Damn. That is not good. I keep defending the cheeto-eating bitch, but she just keeps doing dumb shit.
The only logical explanation as to why she would have lost all visitation rights would be because she failed the drug and alcohol test.

Lindsay is looking for a new apartment.

Ew. Can I just say that I am not a fan of the lumberjack-plaid that's going on these days? Alright, I'll probably be wearin the shit in like two months - after it's grown on me - and it'll totally be out of style by then. Whatevs, Linds is rockin it.
La Lohan is in the market for a new apartment. Apparently the house and the apartment she owns are not enough. Where the hell is Dina? Do you think that by getting sober Linds realized that Dina is a crazy publicity hungry bitch? And where's MIchael?
Ooooh Lindsay.

Kirsten Dunst smells?

I don't know that I believe this, but I like it. Kirsten Dunst seems mellow. She's not always all glammed out, she stays out of the press and she just looks like a hippie. That equals mellow, right?
Well, apparently her friends are saying that she smells. An insider at Star Magazine says:
“Kirsten’s friends have nicknamed her ‘Stinky.’ She always has the worst body odor!” But [stylist] Weiss says that’s an easy one to fix. “She should make sure to always wear tank tops so she can wash her underarms often when she’s out.”

Uh, I dig the need to be different. I dig her far from perfect teeth. But when you smell, that's just wrong. Gross.

Riley Gile's ex speaks out. But wait, what about Lindsay?

Breanna Tierney is using her position as Riley Gile's ex-fiance, for some time in the limelight. Yeah, I'd do it too. For the money. I don't know that I'd want to be known as the bitch that got dumped for fire crotch...
Alright, so Breanna is telling the Enquirer all about the first time she met Lindsay and how she knew it was over with Fug Giles. She mentions that as soon as she found out that her ring (the engagement ring) was cubic zirconium, she knew it was over. Then why the fuck did she continue on with him and support him through rehab? Dumb bitch that dated an even dumber bitch.
Riley and La Lohan won't last. No way.

"She came into the meeting with Riley, and she comes over and sits next to me, being overly nice. She was complimenting me on my hair and trying to be my friend. It didn't seem sincere at all.
"A few days later, I get a text message from Riley telling me he wanted to 'take a break.' I knew instantly it was because of Lindsay."
"But when he finally confessed to me that he had sex with Lindsay in one of the stairwells at Cirque — that was it, we were done. Lindsay has no morals and needs some serious help — besides drug rehab — for all her other problems."

Hahaha. Breanna and Fug Giles were together for like three years! Not to mention that, I like the whole - having sex in the stairwell - that'a girl Lindsay.
Ahhh. Lindsay ALWAYS comes through. And ya'all wonder why I'm obsessed with the biatch.
She's fabulosity. No? YEEESSSS.

Kat Von Douche. Aww, just playin.

Kat Von D was at the TMobile Sidekick LX launch party on Tuesday night. She just recently got a new tattoo of her best friend Pixie.
But where she got the tattoo is more interesting.Kat's tattoo How long have they been friends? Whatever, this bitch can get whatever tattoos she wants, her voice can attest to that, right?
I think Kat Von D is gorgeous, and I was forming a positive opinion about her until like two people - in one day - told me that she's a total bitch. Like in person, she sucks. I guess I could see that, huh?
Whatever, she's 25 years-old. Let her do her thang.

Kimora and her Baby Phat.

Kimora Lee Simmons is my new obsession. Have you watched her reality show? This girl is pure class. Really, she is. Just because you have more money than god, doesn't mean you got class, but this girl does.
She's a fucking tomcat, and I don't even know what that means. Really. Kimora is fierce, she works hard and I didn't realize that she was a model. But she was...
Anyhow, here she is with her two daughters and her man - Dijmon Hounsou. He's a model and a dancer. He acts too, but that list is nothing to write home about. Well wait, I shouldn't discount a role on Beverly Hills 90210, should I?

Lindsay is a boyfriend stealer. SWEET.

Awesome. Lindsay Lohan is proving me wrong. She doesn't need to be on drugs to cause a commotion.
It seems that Riley Giles had a girlfriend when he met LaLohan, and never broke up with her. He just stopped calling. Can you blame him?
I mean yeah, that's totally the pussy way out, but did the girlfriend actually think that Linds would stay away? Nah. It ain't no thang for her.
Right on girlfriend. Lindsay is not in the wrong at all. Riley is. He's the one that was committed, not Lindsay.
Whatever. They're all so young. Do it up Lindsay!

Mariah Carey turned away.

Still hanging out in Los Angeles, Mariah Carey was out on the town last night. After reportedly being turned away at the door at Hyde, she made her way to Winston's.
So what's the deal with Mariah Carey being turned away? She's a fucking legend man? Hyde will let people in like Heidi and Spencer - who do press at Taco Bell - but not Mimi???
Lame-o.

Nekky pictures of Vanessa Hudgens are doing some damage.

I knew this was coming. Disney has decided to not include Vanessa Hudgens in their next installment of High School Musical. It'll be the third for Disney, but not for Vanessa...
What's at play here? Uh, her nekked photos guys! I think it's silly, but I'm surprised it didn't happen sooner. Disney exclusively told Ok! magazine about their decision.
Oh well. She probably doesn't care. I mean come on, she's dating Zac Efron and she's getting more press now than ever before.
Sweet deal.

Britney's lookin rough.

We all know that Britney can't stay away from Starbucks for more than 24 hours, but it's all good.
Brit was in Malibu Tuesday offering straws to the paps. Totally random. She looks horrible. Wait, I take that back. Miss Spears looked like supreme white trash. That pink top and her hair are atrocious.
Poor, poor Britney. When is she with her kids?

Miss Lohan is shopping in Los Angeles.

Yeeeeaahhh. La Lohan is making the rounds in L.A. Do you believe all that shit about Lindsay being broke? I don't.
I'm totally believing that she spent a butt load of money last year, she was partying like a rockstar. Duh. But broke? Fuck no. I don't buy it.
She's already shopping on Robertson Blvd. - uh, she can't be that broke. But (!) she's looking hot and she's here. So that's all that matters, right?
YEAH!

What? Katie Price and Peter Andre are being inappropriate?!

Oh I love it. I just love them. Aside from their horribly tacky wedding, the two of them are horribly tacky and that's what is great about them.
Katie Price has told us in the past about Peter's performance in bed, how big he is, what they do, etc. But this time, it's Peter talking about Katie. Bring it!
Peter said, "Katie is a filthy bitch and I'm her temptation. Everybody has fantasies and when it comes to sexual ones, when you close your bedroom door and it's just you and your partner, anything goes."
"If we're sat downstairs with the kids and the nanny, Kate tells me off if I discreetly suggest we sneak off upstairs. She'll say, 'Pete, you make it so obvious you want to go upstairs for a shag.' And I get really embarrassed. I'm like, 'Thanks honey!' So that blows that out."

Peter is so Euro-trash, I love it. If you don't watch their show already (it's on E!), then you really should try tuning in. The wedding was great, the preparation for the wedding was great.
It's all great.

Britney matches her wig, to her crusty eye.

Britney, what is on your head? Do you think she does that, just to switch it up a bit? Probably, huh? Whatever, it makes her look crazier and I'm all bout that.
Last night she "turned herself in" to the Van Nuys police station in connection with that hit and run incident from earlier this summer. I really like how people are making a big deal out of this, like something bad is actually going to come out of this. Yeah right. They don't give a fuck, she doesn't give a fuck.
You know Brit keeps telling people that she's wearing those sunglasses because she has pink eye. Is that the reason for the GD pink wig? And, come on. Who in the world has pink eye for like a week.
Okay, so maybe a lot of people. I don't know.

You gotta shake it off Mariah.

Mariah is so fabulous. She just is. Mimi is in Los Angeles at the moment, and was seen out last night in WeHo at Robert De Niro's place, Ago.
She looks a little unsteady on her feet, but fuck, I would too if I wore those clodhoppers. Mariah Carey can't really do any wrong. Well, when she dated Derek Jeter, that was wrong.

Gayken's on Broadway.

Gayken is back. I'm actually liking it, why? Because I love to hear Michael K talk shit about him.
Has Gayken come out of the closet yet? Hmm. I don't think he has, but, I'm not going to be the one to tell him he's a homo, I've been getting into trouble for that...
Aiken is going to be in a Broadway show that starts in January. The director had nothing but good things to say about him, but you don't really care about that, do you? Nah.
Spamalot is the name of the show, and supposedly they're expecting it to sell out.

La Lohan is here.

Lindsay Lohan is back in Los Angeles, you're going to get sick of me talking about it. But she is.
Linds was in Beverly Hills this afternoon, probably trying to stay warm, because damn it was cold today!

Kathy Griffin always said she'd fuck Jerry Springer, right?

Get it girl. Fuckin awesome that Kathy Griffin is dating a bazillionaire, right? She deserves it.
The woman knows she doesn't look like Angelina Jolie, and she works it. Kathy Griffin and her new beau, Steve Wozniak - co-founder of Apple bitches - were in Las Vegas last weekend for the opening of Diablo's Cantina in the Monte Carlo casino and hotel.
I love her and need more of her.

Is Pamela Anderson still married to Rick Soloman?

Where's your ring Pammy? Didn't you just get married?
I seriously would think that she would be advertising her new marriage by at least, wearing a wedding ring.
Upf. Thought wrong.
She's busted.

Paris in Rwanda. WTF?!

Ugh. Shouldn't Paris stick to things that she knows? Like drugs and clubs and shoes and clothes?
Well, bitch is going to Rwanda. Yes, folks, Rwanda. That's hardcore. I don't think she knows what she's getting herself into. Has she read about the turmoil that's been going on in central Africa for the past, however long we've been alive? Maybe, but doubtful.
Paris sat down with Newsweek to discuss her upcoming trip.

"I'm scared, yeah. I've heard it's really dangerous. I've never been on a trip like this before. I love having everything documented. It shows people what everyday life is like for me, how hard I work. There are a lot of misconceptions about me."

Eh, gotta give her some type of credit, right? Bitch is trying. Go Paris.
I still support you.

Yeeah bitches. LaLohan is back in Los Angeles.

She's back bitches!!! Yeeeaah. I've been waiting, and now she's here. In Los Angeles, that is.
Lindsay went and saw that new Elizabeth movie Sunday night. But hey, I can't complain about what she's doing, as long as she's doing here. In L.A., where she belongs.

The black asian chick, Kimora Lee Simmons.

If you're not already committed to watching Kimora Lee Simmons, Life in The Fab Lane, you definitely should be. This girl is fierce. Ghetto-fab fierce. She's great. Absolutely great.

Britney buys Justin's Future Sex Love Sounds?

Britney Spears was hittin up a RiteAid on Saturday night. That girl LOVES the drug stores. She's always there buying makeup, can't she spring for even the Mac counter at Macy's? Jeez.
Britney's got her little paparazzi bitches doind everything for her, and it's awesome. Last night, she sent one photog to go and buy her Justin Timberlake's cd. Holla.
Britney's a fan.

UPDATE

Britney sent a photographer to buy Timbaland's cd, not Justin's cd.

Britney Spears ditched the bird. Word.

At least she got rid of that damn bird fedora! Finally. Maybe she's been reading my blog...
Britney was out on the town this weekend in Los Angeles, and as per usual, she was very sweet to the paparazzi. That girl knows how to work em!
Fuck, she has em pumping her gas, getting her Starbucks and changing her flat tires. Even though she comes off stupid sometimes, I don't think she's all dumb...

Justin Timberlake is in Toronto. Those lucky Canadians.

Justin! Could you be any more perfect than you are? No. He's reached a level that will not be surpassed by anyone.
Justin - he's mine - Timberlake worked out on Sunday morning, then strolled back to his hotel in Toronto Canada. He was all decked out in Roots clothing, but why?
Well, apparently the hottie recieved ten bags of clothing from them. Ten! I love how the rich people get free shit. It makes sense.
Whatever. Give Justin whatever you want. I'd like to give him a little something too.

Tara Reid is talking shit bout Lindsay and Paris?!

Aw. It's sweet. Tara Reid actually thinks that she is on the same level with Paris and Linds. Didn't she get ignored by Paris a few months ago upon trying to get into Hyde? Haha.
I get where the girl is coming from, but come on. When was the last time she worked? Uh, that shit show that didn't last two weeks on E!, Tara-dise???
Whatever. Maybe she'll start getting press again and amusing us all. She really is a good time, or seems like one anyways.


"I think the reason I never ended up in as much trouble as Paris [Hilton] or Lindsay [Lohan] is that I'm not stupid, so I'd never do a lot of the things those girls do. You'll never read a story about me going out and partying when I'm supposed to be working, showing up on a set drunk or missing a day, never. But when I'm not working, why shouldn't I have fun? Am I supposed to stay at home and live in a cage?"

"I was a party girl, but I played by the rules. Yeah. Like, Lindsay makes $15 million a movie, so why doesn’t she have a driver? I don’t get it. If you get drunk, that’s fine, but don’t drive. They need to straighten up a little bit and make better investments. And they should surround themselves with better people who don’t let them get themselves in trouble."

Is Britney tanning again? Jeebus.

Wow. Uh, I was defending this shriveled up woman earlier today wasn't I? We all know how much Britney loves the tanning salons and she showed us again last night in Malibu.
Once again, it is so easy to post about Brit daily. Even when I kind of try to not post about Britney, I fail miserably every time.
Whatever. Big ups to you Brit.

JLo's butt ain't got nothing on Lindsay's new ass.

Check it out!!! Lindsay's got her butt back!
She looks uh-mazing. Fierce. This is the hot mess we've been waiting for.

Lindsay Lohan is moving to Utah? WTF?!

This is getting worse and worse every day. Now the bitch is moving to Utah?! Oh no.
Supposedly Lindsay's talking about buying a house there. Once she's not fucking that Riley Giles guy anymore, she'll totally want to be back in Los Angeles.
Okay - buying a house for her ain't no thang - but Utah?! I cannot express my dislike for this idea any more. She'll be back in L.A. sometime this week, and I'm sure that's going to be havoc. Pure havoc. I can't wait.
Don't turn too suburban on us Linds. She's been spending a lot of time at Target and Best Buy. Next thing we know, she's not going to know how to dress.
Oh my god it's starting already. Look at all that black. Black's great, but the combination is as if she's already losing touch.

Katie Price doesn't like Victoria Beckham? Go figure.

I love Katie Price. She's really being going by her other name, Jordan, lately but I stick with what I know.
So, if you don't watch Katie and Peter, you're really missing out. Katie Price and Peter Andre are two of the tackiest, euro-trashiest people I've ever laid my eyes on. For reals. Oh the show is FABULOUS. Really, you're missing out, BIG TIME.
Okay, back to the matter at hand. Katie definitely lacks in the class department, but whatevs. That's who she is, and we embrace that. I think it's high-larious that she's been talking shit, uh I mean, talking about Posh Beckham. Someone needs to talk shit about her. Ugh.
Katie said, "I love her boobs but I wish she'd admit they're fake because they are David's talented but what does Victoria do? Nothing."
Haha. She then went on to say, "But there's room for all of us out there so I do wish them well." That's great.
It's the same as when we talk shit about people, but as long as you say something positive about the person - or in Katie's case, about Posh's husband - then it's all good, right? That girl is such a sleazy bitch, but you know she tries so bless her little heart. Just like that.
I don't hate on Katie Price, but she's got some jealousy issues going on, huh?

"Britney Spears"

Yes, yes, yes. It's obvious that I have a slight obsession with Ms. Spears, but at this point, how can you not? Everyone else is obsessed.
Which brings me to what I want to talk about. A friend of mine told me last night (it was after a few drinks I'm pretty sure), that they really felt for Britney. Now, he probably won't feel that way today, but my affection for Britney doesn't stop.
We started talking about what Britney is now, and I said that the photographers/media/people like me have made Britney's existence surreal.
I live in Los Angeles, and we all see famous people, right? I do. I've never seen Britney, but I can't imagine what it would do to my psyche if I did see her. She would become real, and that's not really what's going on here...
Like I said before, Britney's whole entire existence is surreal. I really and truly feel bad for her, with as much shit as I talk about her, I should.
It's not going to stop though, so I guess I'll just keep writing about her. Why not?